Sparkle of chessed

I was again in one of those situations when the unexpected and inimaginable is happening, out of millilards of people in the world, exactly to me. My domesticated side was requesting me to welcome everything with a good big graceful smile. After all, gam zu le tova, isn't it? My fighter side of the brain was commanding me to do not give up and revolt. While I was caught up in this left versus right dispute, more bad things were happening to me, but hopefully the focus on the brain debate helped me - again and again - to go smoothly through this new trial.

What really happened and why is the topic of a separate discussion that I am not ready to develop yet. What matter is something completely different what happened: the sparkle of chessed from simple unknown people. That woman that brougt me hot water for preparing the food for my baby, or that guy that called another friend to help me carry the very load luggage, or that woman that started to search with me the little sock that I lost, or that religious guy that brought me a sandwich for the night. And many others. In those moment of darkness they brought the light into my life. 

The dispute right versus left is still running out on the back on my head, but now I know for sure that out of everything the chessed won. So, maybe it is gam zu le tova after all. 

Questions learned during the 9 Days

Every year, the sad period of the Nine Days culminating with the Tisha B'Av, are an occasion for bringing back more humility and restraint and a reconsideration of all the things that I might think there matters but in fact are not that important as I thought. In the last ten years, after the death of my mother on Tisha B'Av, the event is an even straight invitation to more reflection. Years ago, on a Tisha B'Av, I realized how much I want to learn more about Torah and decided to be part of an intensive program of learning that I keep following till today.

But I will not talk about my mother now, but about what I decided to think more about in the last weeks. For happy health reasons, this year I did not fast, but tried to limit as much as possible my eating activities and did not prepare something special during the day. The focus of the nine days this time was how we, as Jews, we can be wise enough to realise that fighting against each other, although both parts may have right, is toxic for our soul. How money and prestige and other vane promises can be put aside when it comes to the understanding and respect of our fellow Jews. Destroying - including a Temple - is so easy, no matter how many years were spent for the complicated building process. 

Can we be better person with the others? Can our leaders have more vision and see the risks of disunity before they decide to be part of a conflictual situation? Can we think twice before accusing or judging someone? Can we dare to give the advice and share our opinion when we feel that something to be decided can endanger our Jewish unity?

These are the questions that will need a long answer and more consideration in the next months. For now, the time of mourning is over and it is time to enjoy the rest of the summer and get ready for the hagim season, with its mysteries and secrets of the New Year that it is about to start soon!