Stop Sensationalising Orthodox Jews

 

Non-Jewish yellow media is so hungry for reading accounts of Jewish Orthodox life. With the emphasis of the voyeur, memoirs, accounts and everything that has to do with those ´strange´ habits of the Jews who don´t eat together with the non-Jews, don´t mix with the non-Jews, don´t even buy from them apparently is becoming instant popularity. Those revelatory stories about all those strange stories such as the mikweh and the shaven head and oh, those wigs the observant women are wearing are turning any religious Jew into a naked doll which is turned on all parts and examined to be sure that it actually looks the same like...you know, the other humans.

Mazel Tov by JS Margot - the pen name of Belgian-Flemish journalist Margot Vanderstraeten - is the story of an ´extraordinary friendship´ between the author and a Jewish Orthodox family. The story starts in the 1990s when Margot was hired to help with the homeworks and other school-related tasks the children of a family whose father was working in the diamonds´ sector. Probably at the time there was no Netflix and not too many OTD memoirs so we may a bit excuse the author for being so awkward when meets her employers for the first, second, third...time. 

Those Jews, who are interogating her about her - then - Iranian boyfriend, are always building up walls around themselves and are stuck in their old centuries-old rules. In the end, of course, she is becoming a friend of them but still, it´s nice to have different, exotic friends. Plus, they don´t want to answer her repeated questions about how was it in the war and other intrusions into a private trauma.

To be honest, there is nothing wrong with the tone of the book - which I had access to in the German edition - and it is well written, but the way in which every couple of pages one has to read about how different, and strange and bizarre customs Jews - the Orthodox ones - have, it´s embarassing. It´s not antisemitic, but it is, as they call it in plain German - ´doof´.

Rating: 1.5 stars

How Are We Missing the Point

´An Orthodox Jew isn´t so much one who keeps Shabbat, kosher, and/or other rules and laws; an Orthodox Jew is one who strives, through halacha and beyond to develop a character that is more God-aware, more God-driven, and more God like. It is a lifelong project, enhanced by all Jewish observants, but cannot be allowed to be lost in the welther of them´. 

I openly recognize that I had a hard time going through this book by Rabbi Dr. Gideon Rothstein, whose shiurim a had the chance to attend a couple of times. We´re Missing the Point. What´s Wrong with the Orthodox Jewish Community and How to Fix It was challenging not because of the ideas exposed, but because more than once I had the feeling that the wording is way too complicated than needed. Exposing simple and strong ideas does not necessarily require complex sentences. 

The topics outlined are serious enough to start a throughout discussion about new shifts - both philosophical and from the pedagogical point of view - of the everyday practice of the Orthodox Judaism. Both the ways in which schools and synagogues operate require a complete change, which does not mean to add more but to reconnect to the genuine sources of belief. It is a return from the secondary and customary sources to the main framework, often obliterated by the dry everyday practice: ´People can become accustomed to any sequence of actions and make them an end of their own, forgetting the larger framework into which they were supposed to be integrated´.

Although going through this book took me a long time - to be read months - it was worth doing, especially for ideas in the second part of the book. Hopefully one day all those strong voices within the Orthodox Judaism will get together on one voice for a noteworthy change that will correct the current perspective missing so many important points.

Film Review: Menashe

'For me, cinema is about opening worlds and understanding them', said in one interview the film director of Menashe, Joshua Z. Weinstein, a movie that gathered appreciations at big world film festivals, from Berlin to Sundance.. Without being Hasidic himself, Weinstein touched upon in this movie an issue not enough discussed: how it is to be a single dad in a Jewish Orthodox community.

Menashe is a widower, with a 8-year old son, fighting to make it from a day to another,while working as a cashier in a kosher supermarket. A good simple soul that does not want to fully conform in a community where the decisions are taken by others and where is a high pressure to obey to rules, from the way you dress to the way you pray and the number of children you have at home.

Considered unable to take care of his son, he had to surrender custody to his wealthier in-laws, until he is finding a new wife. His dates - arranged by the matchmaker - are a nightmare and it reminds him of his own marriage that was far from being happy. Menashe was married by his father at 22 (relatively late according to the religious communities), with a woman with whom he did not share too many happy moments. In communities where the social pressure is so big, happiness is not a choice: a man should provide continously to a permanently expanding family. As the duty of the woman is to have as many children as G-d allows, the duty of the man is to be successful both in this professional endeavours and in Torah learning.

The movie, spoken in Yiddish, is easy to watch, focused on Menashe's story - played by Menashe Lustig that apparently went through a similar experience. More than the play of the actors - not impressive in my opinion, the story is what captivates, with a warm empathic touch. Indeed, the situation of single/widowed/divorced women in the strictly religious communities is often portrayed, but what is going on with a man in a similar situation is less known. 

Indeed, Joshua Z. Weinstein succeeded to open and create understanding for untold, hidden stories.