Before reading this book I didn't have any idea about how it is to be Jew in Memphis. Now, I have the impression that it is similar to any other remote areas - from the point of view of the symbolical center of New York City: women are always busy with the kids and the preparations for Shabbos or the high holidays, praying or working men are almost absent and very tired, children are trying to challenge the rules. Traditional islands in the middle of the modern world, a world not always understood or accepted.
Batsheva - whose name means "daughter of oath" - and his daughter Ayala are moving to Memphis. She is a convert whose late man - we supposed they were married - Benjamin is originally from here. Shortly after they are starting their new life, the ladies are mobilizing to find any single detail of their life and only the conciliatory and wise Rebbetzin Mimi could stop their unstoppable curiosity and gossips (various stages of lashon hara). Trying to be friendly at the beginning, they are offering to Batsheva the opportunity to teach arts at the girls school and she is doing her job very well, becoming a confessor for the rebel girls. But as the tensions are arising between the girls and their mothers - the men, husbands and fathers are rarely present or involved in the action of the book - including the departure of one of the girls, Shira, with a Gentile man, Batsheva is considered the scape-goat and the funding for her class is cut. We have also the shadows of a love story, between Yossef, the rabbi's only son who decided to leave yeshiva and Batsheva, another matter of conversation and worries for the ladies.
All the characters from the book are very well portrayed and we can easily represent them in the real world. Actually, I was almost (not fully, because I don't like this type of activities) laughing when reading about the underground surveillance of Batsheva's move by the vigilant ladies: I saw often such guardians of the faith. Batsheva is very open (close to naivety) and doesn't want to hide nothing from her past: she used to be a rebel, had sex at 14, got a tattoo. Had a revelation that her place is in Judaism and while following her path met Benjamin. She wanted to offer her daughter, Ayala, a Jewish past, but in comparison with the ladies from Memphis, the traditions she is offering to her daughter are freshly interpreted. This is not the routine of repeating over and over again - too mechanically sometimes - what she was taught in the family, but offering a new light of the old tradition.
Whoever grieves the convert transgresses three prohibitions (Baba Metzia 59b and Rambam, Hilchot Deot 6:4) and we are commanded several times to accept the convert but in reality there are situations when the community is overreacting because of too much observance of every step and move of the convert. Either she/he is too strict or too relaxed, there it might be never enough. But I am convinced that if the person made the choice of Judaism for the beauty of the religion and thinking will not stop being a Jew: there are always challenges and pressures and if your faith is strong enough, you go further, whatever the circumstances
Often, we focus too much on cooking dozen of dishes for Shabbos or high holidays, the size of the skirt and the set up of the hair-cover but omit to teach our children the joy of praying or the living sense of the tradition. The choice might be difficult and we need to keep some limits of the innovation, but a fresh air should be let enter our spirituality rooms. And the whole discussion in the book made me think over and over again about something I've recently approached with my yeshiva acquaintances: you don't have to hide from modernity and civilization, but to make the good choices on the basis of halachic options. We should dare to talk and address issues and continue discussing. Our minds need the fresh air of thinking.
The book is entertaining and a bit mysterious: the story is told by supposedly a woman, part of the "we" group of surveillance and vigilance. The explanation in the text of various holidays and traditions was a bit uninspired and partially stereotypical, but it's enough action for easily going beyond those death paragraphs.
I fully recommend this book for Shabbos or as a choice for a Jewish women book club. You will have a lot of food for thought.
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